shatter, shattering

2. VERB

If something shatters your dreams, hopes, or beliefs, it completely destroys them.   

• A failure would shatter the hopes of many people.     
• Something like that really shatters your confidence.

3. VERB

If someone is shattered by an event, it shocks and upsets them very much.     

• He had been shattered by his son's death.     
• the tragedy which had shattered his life.

shattering: Something that is shattering shocks and upsets you very much.    

• The experience of their daughter's death had been absolutely shattering.   
• =  devastating   

....... Cobuild